I'm mad.

Just back from dinner.

I’m mad.

So I’m blogging.

Get ready for a rant disguised as a lecture.

In Brussels, I recently had an argument with a cosmopolitan Nordic that I had met only once before. The discussion started just before a group dinner. It began with a question directed at me early in our conversation, followed by several Scandinavian witticisms.
Did Americans really impeach President Bill Clinton for getting a blowjob from a willing intern? Felled by fellatio, how funny. No European public would ever dare drag a politician’s private parts out for public discussion. Impeaching a president for lying about a
blowjob. Honestly. Silly Americans, puritanical pirates, declaring mutiny on a leader for an act that had nothing to do with his position (his political position). Wink, wink.

My first reaction was irritation. My irritation had nothing to do with the topic. I was irritated by the tone.

To say that Clinton’s impeachment was not a smart or a stupid national obsession for the American public at the time that it occurred is not a topic that offers much real discussion. I simply believe that it’s not my place to determine what is or isn’t worth national scrutiny—nor
is it my Nordic friend’s.

What’s significant to a national constituency is significant to that national constituency. Period. What one country considers important may strike certain of members of the concerned country as well as those external to the country as ridiculous or backwards or silly. But that does not negate the issue’s overall importance to the nation.

National name-calling, or asking a random citizen from the country how his or her fellow citizens can be so “silly” is a bit off-putting, whether or not the person asking the question has a point outside of demonstrating how worldly (and wordy) s/he is.

That isn’t to say a citizen or a non-citizen can’t judge national priorities. If anything, that’s our job as members of the human race—to judge and criticize the concerns of our various human
communities. But judge them with interest, not disdain. Dissent, but don’t dismiss. Look to understand why a national constituency considers a particular event significant. Express surprise and even horror, sure, but don’t blow off the blow up over the blowjob (ha ha, I’m wordy too) as an inexplicable glitch in the American national psyche.

Or, if you do, don’t ask me to join in.

A better question would have been what do Americans expect from their politicians? That is a question that can lead to a dissection of WHY Clinton’s sex life became national headlines. That’s a question that opens up several possible conversations about political strategy, electioneering, the mainstream media, American culture, history—we could go on for days.

Cosmopolitan people know that national communities, regional communities, religious communities, ethnic and economic communities—any type of community is going to produce community caricatures. Americans are hypocritical hyper-moralists, Italians wouldn’t know good governance if it ran for Miss Italy much less Prime Minister, the French are too busy striking to get any work done, and the Nordics mistake their geographical position for a sign of social superiority (Silly Americans!). But the sign of a true international is one that recognizes that these caricatures are the products of a myriad of historical, social, economic, and structural forces. Let’s not collapse these forces into cosmopolitan cultural jokes meant to (wink, wink) establish the cultural hierarchy at dinner.

Place Luxembourg

Happy hour starts at 17.00 at Place Lux, which circles round the West entrance to the European Parliament.

The European Parliament is located a block or so away from its more powerful (if less democratic) superiors, the Commission and theCouncil. It is labyrinth of glassy facades that hosts the 785 Members of the European Parliament, their staffs, their staffs’ staff, and an ever-expanding army of interns.

Rumor has it that despite the multitude employed by the Parliament, the buildings are so expansive that even several interns have their own individual offices. It is possible to pass an entire day inside the Parliament without once interacting with another human being off-line. At some point, some of the more tiny offices will be converted to closets, I’m sure, but until then…

By 18.00 at Place Lux, the beautiful young Eurocrats are sufficiently soused to start flirting with each other. Flirtations border on the intellectually inappropriate, but in Place Lux, it would be impolite to accuse anyone of impolitic behavior. Politics is rarely served straight—there’s always a shot of sex to take the edge off.

After the inexpensive excess of Happy Hour, men with enough money then buy bottles of over-priced champagne and hand out glasses to bevies of beautiful young bureaucrats. The point of the champagne, one drunk dilettante from the Mediterranean informed me, is to hook a date for the night. “One of the girls drinking with me will probably need someone to take her home tonight,” he explained. “Quid pro quo.”

Ralph’s is the youngest, hippest, and most crowded bar, located at the far edge of the Place and conveniently next to the Fortis ATM,which always has a line. Whatever the weather, Ralph’s puts a second bar just outside the bar's front door to accommodate all the people that can’t cram inside the bar itself. The music at Ralph's is too loud to encourage any real conversation. Instead, most people mix and mingle, screaming greetings at as many people as they can. Next-door to Ralph’s are more quiet bars that stay busy sopping up the overflow from Ralph’s. Across the Place is the bar Fat Boy’s, where native English speakers meet to watch football (American soccer) or rugby, depending on the season.

Late into the evening, taxis and buses line up along the Place to deposit party goers and pick up the people too pooped to party anymore. It’s a nightly ritual that makes one wonder how the Parliament employees that are the Place's most ardent patrons are able to wake up the next morning.

“Practice”, my Mediterranean friend informed me with a wink.“Champagne?”

How to get FREE legal advice in Belgium

I have stumbled across the golden digits.

Yes, in Belgium, a land dedicated to minimizing the economic (if not always the socio-economic) distance between the classes, a free legal aid service is provided. I am kicking myself for only figuring this out NOW.

Once again, for free legal advice, there are three hot-lines available to anyone with a gsm.

Any weekday (Monday through Friday, or Lundi au Vendredi, or Maandag t/m Vrijdag), call the Telebalie

• between the hours of 14.00 to 17.30, a person in need of legal advice can call
• For Dutch (and of, course, English--all Dutch-speakers in Belgium speak perfect English) call 02/511 50 45. Speak clearly, explain your situation, and receive clear, polite, and helpful advice.
• For French speakers, call 02/511 54 83
• Once more, for free legal advice: Telebalie (+32) 02 511 50 45 or E-mail : bjb@baliebrussel.be

• between the hours of 16.30 and 18.00, call "Loyers" (appropriately named, "Loyers" is Lawyers in French). Do not be deceived by the linguistic bias in the name. Lawyers answering this telephone service speak French, Dutch, English AND German, from what I understand. The number is 070/23 33 03.

Caveat (Isn't there always when it comes to lawyers?): You may have to call several times. These are popular services, so the phone lines can be quite crowded. An actually lawyer (! Not a secretary, not a jerk looking to profit from your lack of information, but a real lawyer, an expert in Belgian law, giving you non biased, practical information for FREE)--an actual lawyer will answer your phone call within two to three tries, in my limited experience.

Hope this information gives you the kind of joy that it gave me. Or maybe I just need to get out more. I guess I will have to go to more Aperos Urbains, evenings of communal alcoholism, er, communal gatherings during which one may take alcohol, held throughout the city every Friday night during the summer. Here's to Brussels!

the "Home" documentary, available free online till Saturday

I am currently tracking down how to get official help filling in my tax forms. After spending some time and all my phone minutes speaking with the very nice tax office (025725757...press 1 three times for a Flemish speaker with perfect English), I discovered that the 38 Souverain office listed as an "aid in filling out tax forms" office in a letter that I received from the Ministere de Finance may in fact be a myth. There is no 38 Souverain (Blvd.) and the nice Flemish at the tax office could not explain why not. They did direct me to a new office, Blvd. du Jardin Botanique 50, phone number 026390280. To get your "tax help office", call the tax office central (025725757...press 1 three times for a Flemish speaker with perfect English), offer up your citizen number and your region (for me, Ixelles), and they will tell you your "tax help office", open between 9 and 1 weekdays to aid you in filling out your taxes.

Meanwhile, I have an eco-friend who recommended a good documentary to me. She usually gets things right, and this video is available on YouTube for free until Saturday. After that, I suppose you'll have to search for someone who re-uploaded it to YouTube under an alias and feel generally immoral for watching a film that you "should" be paying to see. Here it is, legally free of charge till Saturday...

(The letter from my eco-friend):
I've just been introduced to a new documentary called "Home" by a colleague. She gave RAVE reviews and apparently it's breaking records for spectators on the internet and television. They had thousands of people show up in France to watch an outdoor screening in front of the Eiffel Tower last week! I haven't seen it but it's a film about ecology and environment, so I'm sure it will be interesting.

It's only available for FREE online until this Saturday, from what I hear, so please check it out before then if you can. It's originally in French, so you may be able to find the French versions, but I've copied the link to the English version below.

The link is:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jqxENMKaeCU

the "BreXpat" call for proposals to unite Brussels Expats

Pass it on, please...

Dear Madam, Dear Sir,

The King Baudouin Foundation just launched 'BreXpat', a call for projects that aim to bring expats and others inhabitants of Brussels together.

As the capital of Europe, Brussels became home to a mixture of nationalities. The European institutions are employing about 40 000 Europeans from all countries of the Union. Some 20 000 lobbyists, 1 400 journalists and over 5 000 diplomats are active around the institutions. Brussels counts almost 300 regional representatives, 2 500 other international institutions, more than 2 000 international companies and 150 international law firms.

However, the various population groups in Brussels don’t always have the opportunity to connect with each other. Because of the socioeconomic advantageous position of most expats, the segregation of this group is seldom raised as an issue, even though a great potential for enriching interactions exists between this group and the other inhabitants of Brussels.

Initiatives of citizens and organisations in Brussels can according to the King Baudouin Foundation bridge the gap that exists between expats and others inhabitants of Brussels. We believe that a multiplication of small initiatives can have a substantial impact on the larger picture.

The King Baudouin Foundation therefore launches for the third time a call to expats and Brussels based individuals and organisations: if you have an idea to bring expats and others together, you are invited to submit an application for financial support.

More information can be found here: http://www.kbs-frb.be/call.aspx?id=209650&LangType=1033

Kind regards,

Nele Verbruggen

Programme Officer
King Baudouin Foundation
Brederodestraat 21, B-1000 Brussels
T: +32-2-549 02 43
verbruggen.n@kbs-frb.be
www.kbs-frb.be

How to find a flat or apartment in Brussels

I’m not acquainted with the housing market, or how to purchase rather than rent a residence, so can’t share how to do that at the moment. If you’ve purchased a home in Brussels or Belgium before, please feel free to share how to go about buying a house or apartment in Brussels if you are not Belgian. There is no way I could afford to do it, but that doesn’t mean that I can’t blog/dream about it.

The hunt for apartments in Brussels is a lot like speed dating. You cover a lot of ground in a small amount of time in hopes of finding the perfect rental.

First, you research the properties, the neighborhoods, and the potential roommates. This can be done online or, as is more traditionally Belgian, offline. Next, you set up appointments to see the property and meet the property’s proprietor or the proprietor’s proxy. During the meeting, you have about 15 to 30 minutes with the proprietor to establish general expectations for both sides. Then, you spend the next few weeks mentally comparing your rental options. Finally, you make the selection and sign a contract.

The Belgians: It is traditional in Belgium for a young couple to purchase an old, preferably hollowed-out house and then proceed to renovate their “new” house for the rest of their lives. There is a Flemish proverb that each Belgian is “born with a brick in the stomach”. This brick symbolizes the first stone of the Belgian’s future home. Belgians see owning a residence as an essential sign of adulthood and maturity. Renting or living in a town council home when above a certain age in Belgium is perceived as sign of social failure within much of Belgian society. To avoid this, Belgian parents often sponsor their adult children in a bank loan to purchase their first (and final) house before the Belgian kid turns thirty.

Belgian couples don’t get married to demonstrate commitment, they renovate. Marriage would be too easy. A marriage can be dissolved, but, in Belgium, renovation will never finish.
(Unless the couple hires Eastern Europeans to do the renovation “in the black”, without paying for the proper building permits and construction taxes. Then, provided the neighbors don’t turn the couple into the Belgian police for side-stepping Belgian national laws, the home renovations may actually finish before the couple dies of old age.)

The non-Belgians:

For those of us that prefer to outsource our plumbing problems and settle for a rental, this post is for you.

Prior to the hunt: Prior to initiating the hunt for a rental, it’s good to plan to visit or stay in Belgium or Brussels while searching. There are several inexpensive “aparthotels” in Brussels, where home-hunters can pay relatively cheap rates to rent a semi-temporary fully furnished apartment complete with Internet (for online home-hunting) and cable TV. It's easy to stay here while you search for more permanent accomadations.

Belgian Proprietor-renter relationship: Before you start your apartment search, it’s good to know how the proprietor-renter relationship in Brussels works, both legally and "en effet" (in fact). Once again, this is according to my and my acquaintances' experiences, so please comment if your experience is otherwise.

When signing a contract in Belgium for anything, from housing to employment, it’s essential to read and sometimes even write at least some of your own contract. The contract in Belgium is the source of all the power and powerlessness in the relevant relationship.

With housing, think of the rental contract as a prenuptial agreement for a guaranteed divorce. To make sure that eventual divorce will go as smoothly as possible, some basic prenuptial guidelines include:

1. The renter will promise to return the apartment un-damaged (so the renter with the proprietor should look for and record with SIGNED PHOTOS any pre-existing damage to the property prior to signing the rental contract).
   
• It is possible to hire a professional to go over the apartment with you and the proprietor, but this can be expensive (I got a quote of around 120 euros). Most proprietors are willing to go over the property with the renter.
  
• As a renter, you should be polite, but insist on signed photos of damages even if the proprietor promises to remember the hole in the cabinet or the water damage to the bathroom floor. Proprietors can get mean at the end of a rental contract, so it’s best to avoid any unpleasantness about “damage caused by renter” by having the signed photos from the beginning of the rental contract.
2. The renter will return the apartment at the agreed-upon date.
• If you want to leave your apartment prior to the end of the dates specified in the rental contract, you can expect to pay what amounts to apartment alimony, unless you can find a proprietor-approved replacement renter.
  
• A one-year rental contract requires the renter leaving early to pay a month’s additional rent for breaking the contract, if no other renter can be found to take on the remainder of the contract.
  
• A three-year rental contract requires the renter breaking the contract to pay three months additional rent for breaking the contract, if no other renter can be found to agree to complete the contract. And so on...
  
3. The renter will pay "charges".
• Rent is included in the rental description. "Charges" may or may not be included. "Charges" cover everything from electricity to gas and water to the cost of cleaning the common properties of the rental space, such as the stairwells and front hall.
• Many "Charges" are estimated, meaning that if you use more gas or electricity than was initially estimated, you will be charged additional "Charges" at the end of one year. If you use less gas or water than estimated, however, you should recieve some money back from the proprietor.
  
4. The renter will pay a Guarantee.
• A Guarantee requires the renter to put the financial equivalent of two to three months rent into a bank account that, to be accessed, requires the signature of both proprietor and renter. This is the way in which the proprietor and the renter can guarantee that a rental contract is dissolved to the mutual satisfaction of both. Neither the renter nor the proprietor can access the money until both sides have agreed to end the rental contract. Part of this agreement will include how to end the rental contract (that is, does the renter owe the proprietor money for damages or for a leaving a contract early? If so, how much?).
  
• All interest earned by the “Guarantee account” goes to the renter. The guarantee is set up by the renter and the renter’s bank—when the renter goes to the bank to set up the account, the bank will give the renter a form for the proprietor to fill out and sign.
  
• Some proprietors do not require the Guarantee and ask only for two month’s rent. The proprietor is to give this rent back to the renter upon the completion of the rental contract, provided the renter adhered to the contract. Agreeing to pay the Guarantee to the proprietor rather than the bank can save the renter some paperwork. However, it can be more difficult to get the full Guarantee back from the proprietor upon the completion of the rental contract. Not to mention, the proprietor will not pay the renter any interest on the Guarantee, whereas the bank will. A Guarantee overseen by the bank is a more equitable way for both renter and proprietor to dissolve their rental relationship.

Proprietors and renters are not often very friendly with each other in Belgium. Belgian law stipulates that if a renter stops paying rent, the proprietor cannot kick out the delinquent renter until three months "sans rent" have passed. So Belgian proprietors are naturally suspicious of foreigners, who can move in and then move out of the country after leaving the Belgian proprietor with a damaged, un-paid for rental property. This natural suspicion can lead to some complicated rental relationships. Stick to the contract (and to Belgian law) to avoid any problems.

Initiate the hunt:

There are two methods for initiating the search for a flat or an apartment in Brussels: online and offline.

Online: There are online resources for viewing apartments, sites for roommate exchanges in several languages, and email lists that send around new requests for roommates or housing. Popular places where you can narrow down rental possibilities according to size, location, and price are Immoweb and Vlan.be. There are also listed rooms and flats available here or here. For roommates, you can try the Brussels CraigsList or an Expat site. Rommates are called "collocataires" in Brussels, where shared housing or apartments are common.

Size varies between a full apartment and a one room studio. Sometimes, with a studio or a "collocataire", shared student housing, you will share a kitchen and bathroom with other singles. Location is nicest when next to a Metro stop or other artery of public transportation. The Brussels Capital region has 19 Arrondissements with different area codes and cost of living, all reflected in the rental price.
Price is anywhere from 300 euros to 2000 euros, charges included. Prices are going up in my experience. I found that my initial sh*thole, er, first student housing in Brussels had increased from 300 to 350 in monthly rent between 2006 and 2009. Price also depends upon whether an apartment is furnished or not. Furnished flats cost proprietors more taxes, so most flats are advertised as "unfurnished". However, previous renters may have left or be willing to leave behind furniture, so don't discount a flat that is merely advertised as "unfurnished". It may actually come with furniture--"muebles" in French, I think.

Traditional home-hunting in Brussels is offline. A home-hunter picks his or her preferred neighborhood and looks for the bright orange “A Louer/Te huur” signs in the window. The sign is always followed by a telephone number and sometimes includes a description of the rental property and its price--remember to look to see if the price includes charges.

Explore your options:

Call the proprietors of the rental properties to set up an appointment to view the different properties. Most proprietors speak a little English and all, of course, speak French. (If the proprietor is from Flanders, s/he will definitely speak English). It's easy to arrange to see an apartment or flat in the evening or on a weekend. Ask for the nearest public transportation so that you can easily find the place. Proprietors, prior to signing the contract, are incredibly accommadating and extremely polite. It's easy to re-schedule or move an appointment around.

Some proprietors rent their properties through agencies. If this is the case, you will meet an agent who will explain the rental contract expected of you. The nice thing about agencies is that there is little awkwardness in what is expected from the renter and from the proprietor. Agencies, and some proprietors, will require that you sign and pay some insurance on the rental property and for your furniture. The price depends on the quality of the property. I've paid anywhere from 70 to 250 euros in insurance fees.


Make your selection:

Choose the room/flat/studio/appartment that you want, go over the property with the proprietor and take photos of any dammaged areas, sign the contract, and set up the Guarantee.

Some lessons that I've learned in my time renting in Brussels:

• you do not need to share your banking information, outside of what is related to the gaurantee and the first month's rent, with your proprietor
• you do not need to show your work contract to the proprietor (Yes, I have been asked. I refused.) Your salary is none of their business.
• Most proprietors set up a meeting between several potential renters at once. This saves them time and creates a competitive atmosphere where the bidding war almost always works to the proprietor's benefit. The potential renter who has the most money up front, is willing to sign the longest lease, and/or is the most "clean-looking" will get the proprietor's blessing. Don't succomb to this base trick. There are a lot of places to rent in Brussels. Sign a waiting list if you want to be considered for a popular flat, but don't sign a contract until you are certain that you want the flat (and the proprietor, who can be constantly "missing in action" when you need him or her, or can be constantly around whether you want him or her around or not.)

If you are looking to sublet your apartment or to rent a subletted apartment, you can also find such options on Expatica or via the Sublet site.

More information can be found here, on the Expatica site, or here, on the official Belgian housing site.

Okay, I'm off to see the Woody Allen play at the Bozar. Happy rental-hunting!

Place Chatelaine

Place Chatelaine is a five-minute walk from where the Ch. de Vleurgat intersects with Avenue Louise. It is home to the Golden Gym and a convenience store-video rental that is part of a Brussels chain called White Night. Each Wednesday between 16.00 and 18.30, the Place hosts a small market. My favorite booth at this market is the Thai booth, which sells delicious Pad Thai, one serving for about four euros.

Place Chatelaine is home to several overpriced and trendy restaurants, cafes, and boutiques. There is also a used bookstore with a charming low-tech staff that records each book sold in pencil on loose-leaf paper. (At the same time, however, there is a cleverly concealed high-tech bookstore security system that consists of white electronic trackers inserted into the last page of every used book on the shelves. No one steals anything from this used bookstore and gets away with it.)

The bookstore has odd hours and somewhat un-used prices (in comparison with my beloved Pelle Melle, at least). The bookstore’s devoted clientele, including several wealthy ladies and gentlemen of inherited leisure, spend long afternoons shopping for multilingual literature that is, at worst, “gently worn”.

Across from the bookstore is a traiteur. The traiteur sells the same brands as the nearby grocery chain Del Haize, but for three times the Del Haize price. The traiteur has decadent late hours and is chic-ly secular, being open on Sundays. (The bookstore is not.)

During the afternoons, the residents of Place Chatelaine and its surrounding streets walk their purebred pets through the Place. Coffee shop clients can see a number of distinctive dog breeds with coats silky enough for L’Oreal commercials promenading with their proud owners.
In the evenings, un beaucoup de la crème de la crème de Bruxelloise gather at a tiny bar at the far end of the Place. The bar, appropriately named “Le Chatelaine”, as in “the Chatelaine”, is the place to see and to be seen—what the French speakers call “m’as tu vu”.

Beginning around 19.00, these esoteric elites of Brussels fill the bar and soon spill out into the Place itself. These influential individuals, City notables spanning from expensive restaurateurs, established entrepreneurs, politicians, and Brussels city bureaucrats, sip table beer and wine from tiny plastic cups while they chatter in English, Catalan, Castellano, Francais, and Italiano. Businessmen wear their most casual couture—recently this seems to consist of brand name blue pullovers and white-collared shirts. Women wear their hair down, dress in trim business suits or skirts, and high-heels. Everyone drinks, laughs, and looks.

By 20.00, the crowd has usually grown so big that it snakes across the Place, even on rainy nights. It’s easy to drive around the Place and avoid the roadblock of tipsy pretty people, but such efficiency would defeat the purpose of the m’as tu vu. Groups and individuals with fashionable autos crawl through the crowd in front of Le Chatelaine, parting the people like the Moses of Biblical legend did the Red Sea. Brussels celebrities meander carelessly out of the way of the vehicles, nodding amicably at the people in the cool cars.

To recognize the class of the people that frequent Place Chatelaine, it may be useful to know a little city history. In Brussels, as in many places, cars have long been a symbol of success. In fact, the City of Brussels has only recently ordered the reconstruction of the Brussels Metro because, previously in Brussels, public transit was the problem of the poorer classes. The eccentric inefficiencies of the Brussels Metro, the trams, and the buses serve to highlight the importance of their historic patrons. Those whose time was valuable could afford to drive, so drive they did.

It is only with the influx of the immigrant business class from London, Japan, and North America, that it has become clear that those with enough money to purchase personal modes of transport might instead actually choose to use to patronize the public transportation.

This concept still hasn’t impacted the elite that gather at Place Chatelaine to toast the evening, many of who park their cars at the nearby Church (adding a rather religious element to the nightly pilgrimage).

This is not to suggest that Place Chatelaine is economically elitist, only that, to me, it gives a rather convincing façade of unconscious privilege.

Class, after all, is a term best defined within a specific context. As an American “mutt” of unknown and suspicious bloodline, I have been raised to think of “class” as a dirty four-letter word that unfortunately exists but should never be publicly acknowledged. Class, my mother whispered to me privately, is about substituting pedigree for breeding, mistaking a purebred appearance for real value. It is not to be appreciated.

In Chatelaine, however, I have come to recognize that “class” is a euphemism for “quality” or personal content—style worn as a symbol of inner substance. That is, my car is clean, a superior quality, comfortable, and expensive—so am I. My literature is classical, multilingual, and well read—so am I. My dinner is late, costly, and expensively labeled—so am I. My dog is a well trained terrier bred for easy urban living—so am…well, you know.

On a more macro-level, Chatelaine does demonstrate the increasing diversity of the upper socioeconomic class of Brussels, a growing group of elite Europeans. Each evening, outside Le Chatelaine, there gather Turks (socializing more in French and English than their mother tongue), Spanish, French, Belgians, some British, Germans, Greeks, Dutch, Danish, a few Nordics, Italians, and various Balkans. The pub’s patrons are a well-bred, well-educated and well-mannered mixture—a demure and exotic cocktail of Continental culture, with a few loud Americans thrown in for texture (and tension?).

In the Place, these different individuals mingle with each other—the upper class of Europe adores diversity, as long as it can pay for its own drinks. Perched on a stool at Le Chatelaine, it’s interesting to consider how these people, aside from the Americans, also form a part of what is known as the “European” class.

“European” is an esoteric, elite Brand that is not affordable to most of the persons that in reality live in Europe (heck, that live in Brussels)— persons who are, inevitably, defined by their nationality rather than their continent. (Especially when we try to apply for VISAs.)

But the patrons of Place Chatelaine live in their continent, not their countries. They are European. The “average” European found at Chatelaine speaks at least three languages fluently, unless s/he is British. The “average” European also regularly travels internationally, carries one to three degrees from a prestigious university and has a devout respect for multiculturalism and environmental policy (and a car). The average European appreciates good wine, knows how to operate chopsticks, knows who Horta and Rembrandt and Versace are and, better yet, knows from where these architects of European culture originate and has seen their original works in person.

The average European, my dear, fellow Bruxelloise, does not take the bus.

As the European institutions struggle to build a pan-European identity, the people in Place Chatelaine are decades ahead of the EU. As “Europeans”, they never question their continental credentials. They do, however, cause me to question how long it will be before the rest of the continent catches up to their European classification, and how much such a mass ascension of such class-consciousness will cost.